One Afternoon's Realization

Crochet has this really addicting factor that doing one piece can be like reading book: you forget how time passes you by. One minute you're onto the first few layers and the next, you already have a bonnet on hand. Then you look at the time and five hours actually passed.

One afternoon, I picked up my crochet needle and yarn and then made a crocheted circle that can pass on as a circular table runner (is there such a thing?). I actually thought of a beanie in mind but the edge started to curl because I did extra double crochets somewhere. So I decided that it would be a table runner instead. But then, I realized that the color doesn't match the color theme inside our house. My sister suddenly popped the big question when she saw me making it, "What is that?" I didn't hesitate to answer the simplest one which was, "Nothing." She laughed and continued to ask, "Then why are you making it? If it's nothing, make it as Phoebe's hat." Phoebe's our crossbreed Shih Tzu, Chihuahua, rabbit, bird (whatever, you name it, she has it) of a dog.

That got me thinking. Why am I doing it? What am I gonna do with it? I looked at my work and saw a circular pattern that doesn't lead me anywhere to. I stopped. And decided to undo my work. The pattern was already as big as my hand but I did not hesitate to undo it, the same way I did not hesitate to give my sister an answer of "nothing." Undoing it was the reason why my yarn was curly. I started a new pattern, something that would be a headband in the future, something of use.

If only life decisions were done as easy as that. If only life decisions can be undone the same way. But it's not gonna happen. Don't get me wrong, I've done a lot of bad decisions in my life but I wouldn't trade it to where I am right now. It's just a realization that sometimes, the whirl of all things, you need to stop and think, and breathe and think again, where you are, why you're there and where you want to go next. Besides, if we can undo our decisions, we might find that boring. After all, where is the fun in that? No mistakes, no heartaches, no pain, no sadness, no nothing. Nothing to make you stronger, be a better person than you are right now. 

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